Commitment

As I approach the celebration of my 15 year wedding anniversary this week, an array of thoughts come to mind. Many memories, some good and some not so good, many goals attained while others still in progress and a plethora of emotions to name a few. I asked my husband to tell me his list of "highlights" not including the usuals (wedding day, special trips, birth of children). It is a thought-provoking question and one that was quite fun to discuss. It brings to light that, while the big events are amazing and what we do tend to remember most, it is the little unexpected surprises of each day that draw us nearer and more deeply connected to one another. The "ups" are great but the "downs" are where we learn the most, grow the most and bond the most. It would seem that these same reflections apply to parenting as well. The achievements of our children are a phenomenal experience. But when one of them is in pain, either physical or emotional, that is truly when we "circle the wagons" and learn the most about what makes us tick---how are we comforted, how do we interpret life events, how do we make sense of things that happen. It saddens me when I hear of a couple calling it quits during one of these down times. Relationships would only be strengthened if they could see past the circumstances, dig deep and cling tightly. Sometimes it seems that we do this as parents as well. When things are at the very worst and we feel as if we have tried everything, we shut down and give up on our children. I wonder what might develop if we were to cling ever-so-tightly to them during their most difficult of times? May we all enjoy the ups and perservere the downs!!